© Denis Fitzpatrick, 2015
‘A little hunchback, a pen behind his ear
and a bundle of papers in his hand, entered the erstwhile sacristy.’ Anatole
France, The Gods are Athirst
Dominus Hopwood had only
become used to his hunchback (which he’s had since his late teens) because of
his first name, meaning ‘Dominant.’ He had always felt that maybe, because of
this name, if he kept his ears and eyes open, he could manage to be in the
right place at the right time to garner a wealthy secret. And the wealthy
distributors of this secret would no doubt discount any threat in his,
supposedly, inept hunchback capabilities in overhearing it. Hope springs
eternal.
Dominus now entered the front of his shop
from the back room, delving into this hopeful well, while bearing some
unwelcome papers, a quote for an expensive dress. Miss Evergreen, who was
waiting, was bound to be displeased. He had only seven years ago (at the age of
forty-three) inherited the dress shop, in the heart of Redferne, Sydney (and
they only sold dresses, of all hues), from a friend, whose last letter said
that the shop was easy to run as the ladies were all very relaxed customers and
simply didn’t mind if you made a mistake, and were super keen to help out. The
world is full of errors was their gracious attitude.
‘I hope it’s what we budgeted on, Dom,’
began Miss Evergreen when Dominus reached his place behind the counter. ‘Of
course, if it’s a little bit more then that’s no problem.’
Oh well, might as well out with it. ‘It’s
a lot more than budgeted for, Miss Evergreen. My apologies.’
‘How much more?’
‘$300 extra for the whole dress.’ He
showed her the papers containing the quote.
‘$300!’ Miss Evergreen exclaimed when she
confirmed the horrible news.
‘Yes, Miss Evergreen.’
‘Well, I’m sorry, Dom, but I’m not going
to pay that for a dress I’ll only wear once, even though it’s for my twentieth
high school get together.’
‘Perfectly understood, Miss Evergreen. And
if you wish to cancel the order that’s not the slightest problem. But I may
have a way where you can still have your fine dress, and only for a very small
favour in return.’
Miss Evergreen was naturally dubious.
‘What sort of favour?’
‘I have been writing for thirty-five years,
and only last week printed two hundred copies of my first novel. It has been
professionally edited, and has a professional cover. I believe the whole book
is just as good as any other serious author’s. Thus, Miss Evergreen, if you
distribute ten of the books to your sophisticated friends, you would be doing
me an immense favour. The novel, I am sure, if only read, will provide a
lasting monument to all art lovers and similar intelligentsia. In return I will
do the dress you ordered and you’ll only have to pay the agreed price, I’ll pay
the extra.’
‘That seems a fine trade, Dom, and I’m
happy to accept. I’ll collect the books here tomorrow at this time?’
‘That would be very kind of you, Miss
Evergreen. The editor who worked on it said that it is a very original idea, as
well as enticingly written.’
‘Well, I’m happy to help, Dom. So now
that’s sorted out, when may I expect my darling new dress?’
‘Give me a week. Be here at five in the
afternoon.’
‘I’ll see you then.’ Miss Evergreen then
left, the both of them feeling they had done a fine day’s work.
*
Dominus was as equally
surprised as Miss Evergreen that his freely distributed books were a smashing
success. So much so that Miss Evergreen had no trouble in raising some extra small
monies towards the author’s printing costs. The donors gave easily and thought
that it was money well spent if the author continues with such astounding
literature.
This acclaim, despite expectations, didn’t
let up, and Dominus soon had some visitors to his humble shop to ask if he had
any more novels planned. By the second such enquiry Dominus had decided to
start work on a new novel that very night, feeling easily able to draw a story
from the notes in his plethora of literary notebooks. He then told the visitors
who enquired after a possible new novel that they could expect something in a
few months. He planned to sell them from atop his counter, at a modest $15.00
each.
Dominus was even more surprised when the
initial print run of 200 units of the second novel, three months later, sold
out in a week and a half. He was ecstatic! Here then was the inevitable proof
that his hunchback had marked him out positively from his fellow citizens, had
shown him to be a fellow who thought very deeply and very wisely. He was so
happy that he considered giving himself a few days’ holidays, just close up the
shop and have lots of very nice Chardonnay. Maybe a cigar or two. A week’s loss
of business he couldn’t afford but he well thought he could close up for a few
days. And he’s got all that book money. But, alas, wistfully thought Dom,
that’s going into another print run, more books this time. Now the world will
see my real mettle!
It was soon after he had received the
second print run of the second novel, 400 units this time, that customers began
returning to his shop to ask for refunds on this book. Sure, it was a good book,
they said, but absolutely paled in comparison with the first. All the returning
customers said they were expecting an even greater masterpiece, but only met
with shallow bourgeoisie fiction.
Dominus was of course happy to refund them
their $15, somewhat agreeing with the response to this second novel. After all,
he clearly remembered thinking to himself soon after starting it, he was
rushing things a bit. One just doesn’t dash off substantial literature; he
really must go about it a lot more slowly, plan things more. Yes, thought
Dominus, I have a natural talent and it’s bound to shine through.
Shine through it must, his first work
showed that, and Dominus had now learned his lesson. He would now work an hour
less per day in the shop and spend exactly a year in getting together a
collection of short stories instead of a novel. He had so many pocket-sized
notebooks filled with ideas that he could probably cull through them to come up
with a vague outline of contents overnight. In fact, doing so should be pretty
easy.
Accordingly, he closed up shop early that
night, a few days before the start of a cold summer, 2015, and began work on
the book that he fully feels will save him or damn him as an author. He was, of
course, entirely confidant in his natural literary ability.
*
It was Miss Evergreen who
brought him the delightful news, exactly one year and one day since he began
work on his first short story collection.
‘Dominus, Dominus, Dominus,’ she said,
actually fanning herself. ‘I’ve just read your new book.’
‘And what do you think of it, Miss
Evergreen?’
‘Dominus, I absolutely loved it! You are
such a better short story writer than a novelist. I absolutely adored each of
them! You are such a distinguished writer, Dominus, that I’d like to be
somewhat of your patron. Continue printing these gems and I will be thrilled to
help out with the costs. And I absolutely insist you keep all the profit.’
‘Well, thank you, Miss Evergreen. You
leave me breathless with thanks.’ And indeed, Dominus had to stop for a short
while to collect his breath and realise his sudden good fortune. Once
collected, he resumed. ‘That is a kind offer that any serious writer would
consider. Let me do so for a week or two. Thank you again, Miss Evergreen.’
‘Call me Joanna.’
‘Would you like some more copies for your
friends?’
‘Certainly, Dom. Give me 15. You don’t
mind if I sell them for a small, tiny profit?’
‘It is but your due, Joanna.’
‘Thank you, Dom. You’ve always been so
kind.’
Dominus was even more surprised when he
sold 300 units of the short story collection in two weeks. Dominus felt that
now he had found his rhythm, now he had found his purpose and stride in life.
It was quite plain to him, and to all his dedicated fans, that he could quite
easily make a good living out of selling his books personally. He just had to
find a quick way of getting more people to sample his wares, and his talent, as
it already has done, is sure to hook the savvy reader into handing over $10 or
$15 for his obviously unique books. This called for a celebration, a nice
hearty meal at some interesting café.
While he was waiting for his seafood
linguine he quietly looked into the future that beckoned and the struggling
past that had led there. Dominus clearly saw, quite simply, that he was upon a
cusp, at the exact fork between two paths his life could go: probable lasting
literary fame, or a virtually guaranteed, regular job, with regular income, and
almost completely devoid of anything potentially threatening. So, Dominus asked
himself, do I want eternal fame, when I might end up living in the gutter? Or
worse, sleeping on surly friends’ couches. Or do I want almost assured
security? Safety?
When the linguine arrived he realised that
he owed no-one his stunning literary talents but he did owe himself security,
owed himself the diligence to never let his hunchback keep him from what is
rightfully his. Yes, security above all was what he owed himself, never to be
in any way subject to those who see him as worthless. And indeed, his readers
would see him as worthless if he did not continue creating fantastic books. Not
only that, if he were to continue successfully self-publishing his obvious
masterpieces he was in fact justifying those who said he’d never amount to
anything because of his back, pandering to their agenda.. No, they were not
worth his attention, not worth engaging at a fundamental level with his
literature. They were only worth ignoring, only worth letting them perish into
their own barbaric souls by withholding from them the fantastic possibilities
of his fiction.
While eating the perfectly al dente pasta he was surprised to feel
relief flooding through him. He was happy with himself now, the happiest that
he’d ever been, happy that he had discovered his quiet path of success, be it
an ever so humble dress shop. He celebrated with two glasses of Chardonnay
after the meal.
~~~
If you have been enjoying Fitzpatrick's stories here you may also enjoy his short story collections, and other books, available online as both Kindle books and paperbacks (go to http://amzn.to/1NfodtN). Other ebook and paperback options are available at http://bit.ly/1UsyvKD Fitzpatrick is also having a collection of short stories, Aberrant Selected, published by Waldorf Publishing and you can follow its journey at www.aberrantselected.blogspot.com
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.